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The Best (And Wildest) Names In Texas High School Football For The 2017 Season

Photo via John Glaser,


With a name like “Kyle Spishock”, I’ve had people butchering the pronunciation of my identity ever since I was born. For anyone who cares, it’s “Spee-shock”. I’ve heard everything from “Slip-shod” to “Schmee-Spee” to things too inappropriate to publish on a website about Texas high school football. When people view names they can’t pronounce, their mind does a backflip towards illiteracy, often seeing letters that aren’t there, or adding random syllables.

We decided to compile an “All-Name” player list of the very best names in the state, digging through for some golden athletes that would look fantastic on the back of a jersey. I’m not trying to bully these kids, so I hope I don’t get a cassette in the mail that plays, “Kyle, this is your tape.”
If anyone knows names that are better, please let us know for a follow-up list. There are 1,445 high schools in state, along with a million something students, so I know we are missing some gems out there.
Without further ado, here are 20 of the greatest players names from the Texas HS gridiron in the 2016-2017 season:


Shabazz Dotson DE, Cedar Hill
JD McNutt OL/DL, Bremond
Kerrion Hadnot RB, North Shore
Dimitos Giannakopolous TE, Clear Brook
Sincere Haynesworth G, Pearland
Bumper Pool ILB, Lovejoy
Tre Diggles RB, Deer Park
Race Moser MLB, Deer Park
Starrland Baldwin CB, Cy Falls
Andronicus Odie S, Mesquite Poteet
Dhaireus Nobbie DB/WR, Refugio
Cash Ricci-Ott TE/LB, Boling
Josh Goodnature RB/LB, Abilene Wylie
Kevion Booty OL, Carthage
Monto President S, Temple
Sir-Christian Kelley DE, Taft
Justin Kaeka-Bacon LB, Randolph
Maycin Smothermon S, Amarillo
Osorachukwu Ifesinachukwu DE, Vandegrift
Hutton Lusty RB/LB, Richland

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